"Ummmm, Can I Get...?"

Have you ever went to the Jack n’ the Box drive thru and said, “Ummmmm, can I get ummmm… (mind goes blank)? You know that you’re hungry but you don’t know exactly what you want to eat. You repeat yourself, “Ummmmm, can I get a number… (mind goes blank again). Finally you tell the person taking your order, “Just a minute please.” The person on the other end says, “Order when you’re ready.” We have all done this and this is fine when you’re ordering your lunch but many of us women treat dating like a fast food drive thru. Let me explain…

Many of us women know we want to date/marry a “good” man so we jump into the dating world- symbolic for the drive thru window. When we get up to the “dating” window we realize we don’t know what we want or need from a man. We realize we have no standard or clear criteria for what we are looking for in a man/marriage partner. Maybe we should tell the person taking our order, “Just a minute please” but instead we date man after man and keep saying, “No, he’s not the one.” “No I don’t like that.” Or “No, I don’t want that.” Meanwhile we don’t know what we want and time waits for no man. Maybe we should drive away from the drive-thru window and “order when we’re ready”. Maybe we should re-enter the dating game when we know what we need and what we want instead of wasting our time and other people’s time as well; and besides there are 3 people behind you ready to order. Hurry up!

We have to know what we what and not what we don’t want.
It is best to take a step back from the dating game and first know what you are looking for in a man. Know what you need. In order to know your needs you must first know yourself! If you are an intelligent women you probably need a man to stimulate your mind so if you go out with Joe Blow and he doesn’t have any conversation- he’s not the one (even if he’s fine)! If you’re a sensitive woman you probably need a man who thinks before he speaks and carefully considers your feelings. With that said you may not mesh well with a man who is completely blunt and “tells it like it is”- he’s not the one!

We must know ourselves so we can know what we need/desire in a man. Personally I’m an aggressive yet sensitive type of woman so I need a man who can stand up to me, yet hears me out as well. So with that said I cannot date a man who is neither overly aggressive, nor passive. We have to know our needs and be honest with ourselves. When we know our needs we know who we are and then we can accurately choose the type of man we need to be with. We must be honest with ourselves and aware of what we truly need mentally, emotionally and spiritually from a man.

Next time you’re hungry and you find yourself in the drive-thru have your order ready- know what kind of man you want. Know what you want and how much it’s going to cost. Don’t waste your time or his time saying, “Ummmmm” when asked, “What are you looking for?” Know what you need, know what you want before you return to the dating game. So the next time the universe asks you, “May I take your order?” Instead of saying, “Ummmm, can I get…” Say, “Yes, I will need a man who is intelligent with a great sense of humor so he can feed my mind, a man that is ambitious and family-orientated because I need to respect my man, a man that is moral and spiritual because I need him to feed my spirit. I need a man who is caring, thoughtful and kind with a cherry on top please!” Maybe we should pause for a minute and, “Order when we’re ready.”

Peace, Miss Deliverance